8 Tips on Encouraging a Torpe to Ask You Out

There’s nothing wrong with liking a torpe—that is to say, a guy who’s a bit on the shy side when it comes to going after a girl he likes. In fact, a lot of shy, quiet guys are sweet and will often surprise you with the depth of their personalities. So instead of being frustrated about how it takes him eternity to ask you out, why not help him along? Here are eight tips on how you can give your torpe that loving nudge in your direction.

1. Be his friend.

8 Tips on Encouraging a Torpe

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Being friends is the first step to helping your torpe be comfortable around you. Be open, offer him a smile, and strike up a conversation that encourages him to come out of his shell. If you’re genuinely sincere about wanting to know more about him, you won’t only get him to relax, but you’ll also strengthen what existing ties you have.

2. Ask him for help.

8 Tips on Encouraging a Torpe

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If you need help with anything, don’t be afraid to ask your resident torpe. If you need someone to assist you with carrying your stuff and he’s around, call him. If he knows his way around cars and you need someone to help you with the spark plugs, let him be your Superman. Trust us, he’ll love the fact that he can do something for you.

3. Compliment, but don’t patronize.

8 Tips on Encouraging a Torpe

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Compliments can go a long way when it comes to boosting your torpe‘s confidence. It could be about anything from his new haircut to how he managed to fix that Rubic’s cube. The key here is sincerity: don’t drop words that you don’t really mean because he’ll sense that you’re patronizing him. Remember that his being torpe doesn’t mean that you need to pat his head way too often.

4. Support him.

8 Tips on Encouraging a Torpe

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If your torpe manages to open up enough to tell you about something that he really likes doing, throw your full support behind him. Be encouraging and let him know that whatever happens, you’ll always have his back. This will make him realize that you’ll always be there to see things through with him.

5. Share your world with him.

8 Tips on Encouraging a Torpe

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Your torpe wants to know more about you, but he’s probably afraid to ask. Save him the trouble of asking awkward questions by inviting him to your usual haunts or to those classes you like taking that you think will interest him. Take him to your favorite coffee shop, or tour him around your jujitsu gym. Doing so will introduce him to the things you like doing, and will act as a sign that you’re willing to share part of you with him.

6. Take initiative, but don’t be to forward.

8 Tips on Encouraging a Torpe

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How long have been waiting for him to ask you out on a real date? If you think it’s been too long, then maybe it’s time to take matters in your own hands. Invite him to dinner in a place that you know you both will like. Say it in such a way that he knows it’s a special occasion, but he won’t feel too pressured by it.

7. Enjoy the silences.

8 Tips on Encouraging a Torpe

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Many torpe guys are very frugal with words. If your man is one of them, then it’s best that you learn to enjoy silences. If there are times when he doesn’t feel like speaking, let him enjoy your company instead. Be quietly relaxed, so that your vibes can get him to be more comfortable with himself

8. Keep in touch.

8 Tips on Encouraging a Torpe

Image from Friends via Giphy

Your torpe may retreat into his shell after spending lots of time with you because he’s unsure of how to proceed with your relationship. Let him know that you’re still interested in seeing him by keeping in touch. Of course, it’s also a must for you to gauge how much you can prod him—he may just want his time alone. If that’s the case, then give him space. Just remind him that you’ll still be there when he resurfaces.

One Response

  1. Nathan

    This so me, I am torpe before but now I do have a different reason like my social anxiety. There are alot of girls that told me I am good looking but I feel awkward when they say that, because I am not, I do have alot of imperfections compare to what I just look. And that causes alot of guys in the company to hate me and bully me (ALOT), that is why I am thinking of resigning to this company.

    Alot of beautiful girls are on our company but I don’t have the guts to tell that to them, ang awkward kaya to tell them they are beautiful (or am I just shy)…

    I hope, that some girl will have the guts to be like that for me. lol

    Reply

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