The difference between a woman and a girl has nothing to do with age; rather it is defined by the way she conducts herself. While it can be fun to date a girl, when a man (not a boy!) is looking to settle down and commit himself to one person, he’s going to want to find a real woman, someone who is in control of her own life and is proud of who she is.
So, for all you strong, confident ladies who haven’t met the right man yet, don’t despair—there are many men out there hoping to find someone just like you, and here are a few reasons why!
1. She speaks her mind.
One very common complaint that men have about their girlfriends is that it seems like many women expect their men to be able to read their minds, instead of just telling their guys what they want of them. There’s no such problem with strong, independent women—they have no qualms about speaking their minds and being clear about their thoughts and feelings, without the need for mind games.
2. She’s secure in her own skin.
A strong, independent woman is happy with her own body. She doesn’t feel a need to dress to impress anyone but herself in order to feel good; she knows confidence is the key to being attractive, and she has plenty of that to show off, whether she’s flaunting her curves or covering up!
3. She can take care of herself.
Living alone is something everyone needs to experience in the process of growing up. A woman who has lived on her own and can take care of herself—and that means everything from knowing how to pay bills to being able to unclog the sink or toilet on her own—is much more attractive to a man than a girl who still needs to be coddled when she has a cold. And while moving out once you have a job isn’t as common in the Philippines as it is elsewhere in the world, a woman who knows how to handle things on her own makes for a better life partner than someone who’s a perpetual damsel in distress.
4. She eats what she wants.
A strong, independent woman doesn’t have to count calories every day; she loves herself with or without curves on her body. While almost all women will diet for various reasons at some point in their life, most men find a woman that’s not afraid to eat a steak and baked potato if she wants to (at least once in a while) far sexier than a girl who won’t eat anything but lettuce. After all, a woman who knows how to enjoy her food probably knows how to enjoy other pleasurable things in life too.
5. She’s financially independent.
There’s a common joke that having a girlfriend means your wallet will always be empty. So many men find it refreshing to find a woman who is financially independent enough to pay for her own things. A strong, independent woman doesn’t need her man to buy her that new purse she has been wanting as a gift—if she wants it, she’ll buy it herself! This doesn’t mean, of course, that you should be militant about splitting the bill every single time you go out to dinner, but guys appreciate it more than you know when you can confidently offer to treat them once in a while.
6. She’s willing to try new things.
A strong, independent woman is confident enough to branch out of her comfort zone and try out new things. Whether it’s trying new food, playing a sport, or just taking up some new hobbies, a man will appreciate a woman who doesn’t mind a little adventure and flexibility in her life, especially when it involves putting forth an effort to give his interests a chance too.
7. She makes her own decisions and lets you make yours.
When in a serious relationship, your partner’s opinions should always carry weight when it comes to making big decisions that affect you both, but a strong, independent woman is totally capable of making hard decisions on her own—and allowing her man to do the same. She knows her own mind and won’t hesitate to go and grab what she wants from life and she expects the same from her guy. On the other side of that, she also accepts the consequences of the decisions she makes, taking responsibility for and learning from both triumphs or failures.
8. She knows when her man needs space.
Strong, independent women often need a bit of space themselves, so they also know how to tell when their man needs some space too. If it’s meant to be, it will be. She’s secure enough with their relationship to back off a little when it’s needed—but she also knows when it’s time to intervene, offer her help, and show support when he needs that instead. And if it’s tough love that’s needed, well, she’ll be willing to step up too.
9. She fights her own battles.
When insulted, many girls expect their guys to step in and say something, standing up for them. A strong, independent woman, on the other hand, won’t wait for her man to say something before speaking up. She can defend herself just fine, thank you very much, and she doesn’t need any man to do it for her. Not that a good man’s assistant isn’t appreciated, of course—it just isn’t always needed.
10. She manages her finances and plans for the future.
An independent woman has learned when she needs to be thrifty and she plans ahead and works hard. She’s not going to spend thousands on new shoes when she hasn’t even paid last month’s rent yet. She knows life never goes quite as you plan it to, and she tries her best to be prepared for whatever lemons that life decides to throw at her. What’s more, she has goals that may or may not involve the man in her life, and she’s determined to achieve these. Because she knows what she wants from life and love and her career, and she isn’t afraid to share her dreams or fight for them.
As babies and children, we are all dependent on our parents. No one is born independent—life experience and the choices we make create that trait within a person. Through her own experiences and trials, a woman becomes stronger and more confident, and independence comes with that. She’s mature and wise; she wants to get the most out of life and knows how to do it. A real man wants a real woman, and strong, independent women who are confident in themselves are as real as it gets.
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Abby is from the USA and moved to the Philippines to be with her husband, David Christopher Hizon, who also happens to be her photographer for most of her writing endeavors. A gamer, a bookworm, an animal lover and a self-proclaimed foodie, she is passionate about everything that she does and hopes that will come across in her writing. Follow her at http://facebook.com/WritersInTandem & http://www.thewritersintandem.wordpress.com