First dates can be pretty nerve-racking. Almost everyone has a fear of not knowing what to say or running out of things to talk about. To avoid that from happening and also to make the most out of getting to know your new potential beau while on your first date–here are some great questions to ask a guy that you’re on a first date with.
1. What are the three most important things to you?
This seemingly simple question is actually quite revealing about a person. By listening to his response, you’ll get a large insight into who he is as a person and what his priorities are. For example, if he answers “my job” first, you’ll get an idea that he’s a career-minded person who might put his career ahead of his relationships. If he answers “my pets”, you’ll learn that he’s an animal lover and that he values companionship. Whatever his answer is to this question, you’ll learn a lot about your date and it’ll likely be fuel for more great conversation.
2. What are the things make you laugh?
Everyone has a different sense of humor. By asking your date what makes him laugh, you’ll learn if he has a dry, sarcastic, silly, or classic sense of humor, and whether you are amused by the same things. You’ll learn whether it’s easy to provoke a heartfelt laugh from him or whether it’s something you might have to work a little harder to do. A person’s sense of humor is very telling, so this question is a great conversation starter and a way to learn what makes him tick.
3. How did you choose your career?
Some people choose their careers a couple of years after graduating from college, others have known what they wanted to do since childhood, others may be stuck in a job that they hate and were pushed into by their circumstances. Simply asking someone what they do for a living isn’t really that revealing about them, but asking how they ended up in that career path is. You’ll learn how they feel about their job, what they did to get there, and whether they plan to stick with it or it’s just a temporary phase for them.
4. What was your family like growing up?
While it might be another date or two or ten before you actually meet his family, one’s family and how they interact with them tells a lot about a person. Take time to get to know not only the man you’re on a date with, but also who he was 10 years ago and what his family is like. If he has siblings, get to know whether he was the responsible one or the baby who got doted on. Knowing what to expect from his family will also be a bonus later on; if you ever progress to the point of meeting them, you’re already a little bit prepared for what it will be like.
5. What are your relationship deal-breakers?
What better way to know what NOT to do than to ask him what his relationship deal-breakers are on the first date? First dates are about figuring out if you’re compatible with each other, so this is a great question to ask, as well as sharing your own with him. Maybe he can’t stand dating a smoker and he doesn’t know yet that you go through a pack a week. It’s better to find out sooner than later if there are any major red flags that will prevent a possibly happy ending between the two of you.
Take your first date opportunity as a chance to really start getting to know the guy you are seeing. Don’t just ask where he works, find out why he works there and how hard he worked to get where he is. Don’t just ask how many brothers and sisters he has, find out what his interactions with them are like and what his role in the family is. Don’t walk away from your first date while you still know next to nothing about him–by choosing your questions wisely, you’ll have a much more productive date!