I’ve had my heart broken many times. I’ve probably even done my share of breaking hearts myself. But no matter how many times I cried my heart out because of love gone wrong, I never stopped believing in it. I’m married now to a wonderful man and hope to start a family with him soon. If I’d allowed myself to stop believing in love, I never would have made it to where I am today. When we met, more than 7,000 miles separated us. It was my belief in love that led me to cross an ocean to be with him, and I have no regrets at all.
I find a lot of people are surprised by my marriage, especially when they learn all the details of how we came to be together. It certainly wasn’t an easy task. They wonder how we had the strength to keep on, when everything seemed to be against us. My simplest answer would be that we had faith that love could conquer anything, and that faith spurred us on. Despite broken hearts and doomed relationships, I never stopped believing in true love, and here’s why.
1. Because not all men are jerks
At some point, in a storm of heartbreak, almost every woman has uttered the words, “men are all the same.” Well, despite having dated some pretty bad ones, I know that’s not true. There is a stark contrast between my first boyfriend, who was emotionally and physically abusive, and my last boyfriend, the kind and loving man that I married. For every scoundrel out there, there is a man who is deserving of love too.
2. Because of my favorite song
Music is a powerful thing, and when combined with the right lyrics, it can affect your mood and your perspective on life. Think about your favorite love song, for a minute. Isn’t it amazing how hearing that song can bring back memories that you haven’t thought about for ages, and can make your heart swell with emotions that you’d forgotten you could have? Music lifted me out of heartbreak again and again, until I found the man who would never break my heart.
3. Because of my parents
My parents are still together today, and it’s amazing when you consider the amount of hardships that they have been through. My mother has a lot of health problems, ones that will never go away, but my father was always there to help her deal with them. Someone once told him that he should divorce my mom, that he shouldn’t have to deal with something so hard. He was appalled at the very idea–he loved her, and that means being there for her even when times are dark.
4. Because of my pets
This might seem silly to some, but anyone who has pets knows the deep love and connection that you share with them. If you can feel that intense love and selflessness for a dog or a cat that barely even knows it’s own name, how much more possible it must be that there’s a human out there who will give you an even greater love and dedication.
5. Because of Disney movies
My husband loves to tease me about being a Disney fangirl, but I will be one until the day that I die. I grew up on love stories like Beauty and the Beast, The Little Mermaid, and Aladdin. Despite the often unrealistic approach that Disney has when it comes to portraying love, Disney movies still taught me lessons about it like the fact that real love can truly overcome anything, even when it seems like you’re hoping for the impossible.
6. Because there is power in belief itself
Sometimes, believing something exists is enough. Look, for example, at a kid who still believes in Santa Claus. As adults, we know what’s really being this so-called magical being, but a kid who still believes in magic has a purity and innocence that I wish we could retain as adults. Fortunately, I was able to keep that inexplicable belief when it comes to love, and believing in love has made it real for me.
7. Because there are many kinds of love
There are two types of love; loving someone and being in love with someone. You can feel both ways about the same person, as I do with my husband, but you can also have platonic love. I believe in love because of all the times my friends picked me up when I was down, sharing their own stories of heartbreak and how they moved on.
8. Because of celebrities
Okay, not all celebrities have the best track records when it comes to love and relationships. But there are a few that stand out and show the world, right in the public eye, that real love is possible. They might have ups and downs, just like us normal people do, but celebrity couples that last despite having the entire world watching and interfering in their relationships reaffirm my belief in love.
9. Because even cynical people change their minds
Most of us can think of at least one person who, either now or in the past, has talked about their disbelief in love, commitment, and marriage. While not all of them will change, I have seen with my own eyes how people open their hearts to love, despite it going against everything they thought and believed in. I have seen women who once laughed at the idea of marriage stand in front of a priest and say “I do.” If even the cynics can find love, there must be something to it.
10. Because of my husband
Obviously, this one was coming. More than anything I’ve witnessed, my own relationship has taught me lessons in love and inspired me to always have hope. My husband made me believe in soul mates, something that I thought was silly before. Together, we have proven that love can overcome all hardships, and when I’m with him, I fully believe that we will get through anything as long as we keep our promises to stick together.
Love is as real as you make it to be. If you refuse the very idea of it because of one bad boyfriend, it will probably be harder to find, but it’s out there. If you allow yourself to believe in love and embrace the idea, your happily ever after becomes that much more possible. Fairy tales don’t exist, but true love does.